My life seems to be all about exhaustion these days, and it makes me feel like a wimp.
Why is it I can’t manage to do anything after I come home from the day job? I’m the one who can overcome obstacles. I’m the one who pulls all-nighters trying to get things done for my crafty business. These days I can’t even think hard enough to compose a list of things to do much less actually do those things. The exhaustion I have is emotional, and the worst part – it comes from the day job.
I never, in a million years, would have guessed I have so much invested in this job. My dedication these days is puzzling, and is sucking the life out of me.
I have to detach myself.
Did I just say that? I’ve despised so much about my day job for so long, feeling very removed from it, and yet now I feel I have to detach. When did I become attached? About two months ago when turned in my intent to retire letter.
I never realized what an important job I have and how difficult it is to train a replacement. I never realized that several people actual covet my job and resent the process by which my replacement has been chosen (and I don’t blame them). I never realized how much I want those I work with to have a smooth transition to the next person to hold my job.
Well, I don’t like this one bit. It has to stop, because I’m tired, and tired of feeling like a wimp. Today I will become strong again and leave the mental garbage at work. After all, I have a thirty-five-year history of doing just that.
Auntie B's Wax 